A/S/L by Jeanne Thornton: A Journey Through Queer Longing and Digital Worlds
As a lifelong lover of both literature and the digital landscapes that shaped my youth, Jeanne Thornton’s A/S/L instantly piqued my curiosity. The very title, reminiscent of the early days of online chatrooms, beckons nostalgia while hinting at an exploration of identity and connection that resonates deeply with anyone who has navigated the complexities of queer existence. Thanks to NetGalley and Soho Press for the eARC; this poignant novel is set to release in the U.S. on April 1, 2025, and I couldn’t wait to share my thoughts on it!
Thornton crafts an evocative tale that dives into the lives of Abraxa, Sash, and Lilith—three trans women navigating the intricacies of adulthood while reflecting back on their teenage years spent creating a video game called Saga of the Sorceress. Set across the years 1998 and 2016, the narrative briskly captures the essence of growing up as a gender-questioning teen amidst the glitchy hum of ’90s internet culture. I found myself swept away by the exploration of queer longing and the fragmented beauty of trans survival.
What particularly moved me was how Thornton’s prose mimics the jagged edges of the characters’ identities. It wades between dreamy imagery and raw, disjointed expressions of feelings, encapsulating the precarious journey of being one’s true self in a world that often strives for conformity. The characters, each an embodiment of their own struggles and desires, feel incredibly real and relatable.
Abraxa’s fierce imagination and determination to uphold the idea that their game is more than just a creation struck a chord with my own creative yearnings. Meanwhile, Lilith’s dichotomy of seeking safety in cisnormative approval while yearning for something wilder perfectly illustrates the silent battles many face. And Sash, who channels her complexity into storytelling and financial domination, highlights a profound need for connection that I found both heartbreaking and beautifully relatable.
While the book’s pacing sometimes stumbles—some chapters felt drawn out and the structure at times unwieldy—Thornton’s ability to portray the emotional core of trans lives is unwavering. The story embraces the messiness of existence, offering no tidy resolutions, which I found profoundly refreshing. It echoes the reality of trans lives: often chaotic, yet brimming with opportunities for rebuilding and reimagining.
Among the book’s many powerful moments is a reflection on the nature of storytelling itself as a vehicle for intimacy. It resonated with me because it mirrors my own experiences as a reader and writer—a harmonious blend of longing and creativity, which can serve as both a refuge and a battleground.
I wholeheartedly recommend A/S/L to lovers of introspective trans fiction, digital subcultures, and narratives exploring queer friendship and creative world-building. Readers looking for an authentic portrayal of gender identity and the creative magic of video games will find a lot to love. This book not only made me reflect on my own past but also reaffirmed my belief in the importance of community and creativity as acts of survival.
Jeanne Thornton has crafted a significant and necessary work that resonates. For anyone navigating their own journey of identity or longing for deeper connections, A/S/L is a heartfelt and enriching read that will linger long after the last page is turned.